I am an avid audiobook listener in case you did not know. I ‘dont read’, my eyes be falling out my head at the end of the day, so I listen.
But the other day I listened to a Chapter in an Audiobook by some business guy (I call him The Boner) who your probably not interested, in which set me a huge challenge. The Chapter of his audiobook was called ‘Stop being a little B$#@%’ and it spoke about how much people pass responsibility (or blame others for everything) and perpetuate their own lack of success. He takes it to extreme though and I must admit, I had to laugh as one of the examples he gave had actually happened to me!
So The Boner talks about the fact the even when you are rear-ended by a car, its your fault. Now, last year I was severely rear ended by some bloke who was probably too busy snap-chatting than observing my car stopped at traffic lights. What occurred was a 4 car sandwich, which cost me a car and a whole lot of inconvenience of having to buy a new car, being without a car to get around while this was happening and using my own insurance to sort this out given he didn’t have any! So my old mate ‘The Boner’ on the audiobook was telling me this was my fault.
Apparently I had left my house at the time of day, I had positioned my car in front of this guys car, I had taken the various turns and engaged in a particular speed which allowed me to be in front of this car when he had his brain fade and squashed right into the back of me. It was a fascinating viewpoint, I had never thought of it this way, and the average person would laugh this off and say The Boner was an idiot. But I think he had a point. Only when we assume full responsibility for things that happen to us, as being caused by us, can we assume control over our lives. We can chose how and when to use emotional energy. We are not as ‘pushed’ around by people and situations being the ‘external’.
So it kinda motivated me to assume responsibility for all things totally Buddha Style. When the Tim Tams land in my trolley, its my fault, not strategic Safeway impulse buy marketing campaigns. I will no longer Aldi for not having stock on the shelves or for shoppers trying to aggravate me with their snail pace on a Sunday. However, at the same time this made me notice how much people DO NOT taking responsibility. Every time I heard an excuse or blaming statement being made by someone, attributing their circumstances or situation as being related to something ‘outside of themselves’, it actually made me shudder! And now I cant get rid of it! My poor staff are at their wits end of ‘assuming responsibly for everything’ or face the Psych Chrissy wrath! Whilst I wait for my crazy ‘responsibility taking’ filter to just calm the heck down, it has inspired me to whinge less and take more action to make myself happy.
After all, if someone wants to walk slow with a trolley- good for them!
Your ‘Whinging Diet’ Extremist